| nursethesoul

furiousgoldfish:

behavioural and emotional patterns of living in abuse:

  • you spend most of your time shut in your room
  • you’re scared of footsteps approaching your door
  • you prefer not to come out unless there’s nobody home
  • when they come back you run to your room/safe place
  • you’re nervous and anxious if you have to spend time in presence of others
  • you try to get away from your home, you wish you could live somewhere else
  • your self-confidence is very low
  • you worry about making too much noise (have a feeling you’ll get yellet at
    or abused for it)
  • you try to move around as silently as possible and try to not be noticed by
    anyone
  • you feel uncomfortable and uneasy sitting at the same table as rest of
    family/housemates
  • you don’t feel like you belong here
  • you feel like a burden to your housemates
  • you don’t feel like you’re worth having around or supporting in any way
  • you don’t feel like anyone will ever love you or believe in you
  • you don’t feel like anything you do is good enough
  • you can’t stand someone watching you do things like cleaning or anything
    else you need to get done
  • you try really hard to still find good points about your life and cling to
    them
  • you strongly worry that you are somehow worse than anyone else
  • you feel like you’re behind on everyone and that you’re failing to live
    your life properly
  • you don’t feel like anything would have changed if you died, or even that
    it would be better if you did

if you’re experiencing most of this, you’re going through abuse. Your value
isn’t in any way less than other humans, and you are absolutely not any kind of
burden. You are human who is forced to live in a way humans aren’t meant to
live. You are in living conditions that disable you from feeling happy,
fulfilled, or even seeing yourself as a human being.  You are suffering. What is being done to you
is not okay. You deserve better than this.